cause I'm addicted, I'm needy, I'm lost without You.
I'm not completely sure why I'm writing right now. It's 1am, I feel as though time just slips through my fingers like cupping water in your hands. This past vacation, I've lived a ridiculously routine life. Wake up, call people, orchestrate plan, execute plan, go home, go to sleep, repeat.
It drives me nuts. I want to get rid of my cell phone, I'm starting to think my prof was right about cell phones "the concept of having absolutely anyone contact you at anytime is repulsing."
Today, I went to church.
I went to church because I wanted to.
I want share this, I went to church today because I wanted my spontaneous act of service to be worship. An offering to Him only, not because I want to build something, but because I want God to know I love Him more today.
If it sounds like I'm hurting, it's because I feel like I can't articulate my thoughts well. It's frustrating, but I'm sure some may understand. My mind at the moment feels like a sore spot. When I was cleaning my church earlier I felt so much negative feedback inside; Satan over and over kept calling me names that hurt to remember. I couldn't look anyone in the face during this time because I had to scream inside my head that I am not an outwardly religious man, there is a God and His kingdom is my life (that is, service to the king).
I'm not a snobby Bible student
My flesh bleeds as yours does.
I'm fine, I just needed to get this out of my head. Prayer is always appreciated
Matthew 5
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